Selling Out

The tension of branding ourselves

Hi Cringers,

The phrase “personal branding” causes a lot of people to want to yak.

And this is coming from a “personal branding strategist.”

I understand why too. “Brand” is frequently connected with products and companies.

And products, companies, and brands are associated with ideas of superficiality and manipulation.

Many of us resist connecting our personhood to these concepts. We are people with souls, brains, and feelings. We’re “authentic,” invaluable, and real.

We are not “sellouts.”

And, in case you need a reminder, here is the definition of sellout:

We often assign this label to content creators and influencers, but isn’t this THE definition of being an employee?

How many of us have dedicated our time and talents to companies we didn’t fully align with because we needed a paycheck?

Maybe the Executive Director sexually harassed people, but you stuck around anyway. Maybe your company regularly destroys the environment with excessive plastic packaging, etc.

Part of the draw of building my “personal brand” was to create my platform on my terms, in my voice, in a way that aligned with my values.

But even as a solopreneur, there are limits.

As my friend Hannah Szabo commented on a recent post: “When it’s our financial security (and our reputations) on the line, we put out a version of ourselves that’s palatable for the market.”

Then we hear advice like, “Just be yourself,” (which I’m guilty of giving) which is aspirational and well-intentioned, but ultimately frustrating because the real advice is, “Just be yourself in a way that’s palatable for the market.”

“Be yourself” to the extent that you stand out, but not so much that you scare people away or make them question your confidence or competence.

And, if you’re neurodivergent, there’s the added complexity of losing ourselves to years of masking, which can lead to things like loss of identity and a host of other challenges I won’t spiral into today.

Being yourself is either a privilege or a risk depending on your situation.

On top of that, "authentic self" is loaded. Do you find yourself or create yourself? And how many people have the time, space, or financial security to really do that?

So, we project a version of ourselves, often an idealized one, into the world.

We sell who we want people to see us as, commodifying ourselves in the process.

But, hear me out, this doesn’t have to be a bad thing.

We live in a capitalist system, whether we like it or not. It’s one of the strongest forces on the planet, next to tsunamis.

By design, it was created to keep us busy and disconnected from ourselves and others. But there’s something powerful in observing this.

We at least become conscious of its effect and open ourselves up to making choices about how we show up in the world.

We can make a conscious effort to project a version of ourselves that we’re proud of, one that attracts clients we genuinely enjoy working with, and that represents our most important values in life.

It might not represent our full selves in all its complexity and messiness, but it is still an aspect of ourselves. It’s still authentic to who we are, and maybe that’s enough.

Is that selling out or is that survival?

How do you decide how “yourself” to be online? Reply to this email and let me know. I’d love to hear from you.

🟡 🟡 🟡

P.S. Looking for a second opinion on how to grow your brand?

With over 15 years of marketing experience, I will ask you questions to help you find the answers you need to grow your business with confidence.